Sunday, August 22, 2010

What Do I Got To Lose?

Since Middle School/High School I have believed 2 bizarre and, by most accounts, morbid things.

#1 - I will never meet the right boy for me. He died in a crash when he was 12. Why this belief and why these details? Not sure. But it's always been in the back of my head. And of course there have been moments (or even multi-year blocks of time) that I have thought to myself "this is silly" but even silly gut feelings usually exist for a reason.

#2 - I won't live past 30. Now this one isn't a plan or something I am looking forward to, or afraid of for that matter. Just another gut feeling. And when I was 14 or so and first started thinking this, 30 was some far off date that I would get to someday. Now, it's 7 months and 6 days away. And there have definitely been times I have thought to myself "What if I'm right?" I contemplated writing letters to all the key people in my life telling them everything I probably should tell them anyway but it turned into a terrible weeping mess... and I only made it through 2. I figure there are better ways to spend my time on the off-chance that I do, in fact, have only about a year to live.

Name: Project Bucket List
Time Frame: Now through March 28, 2011
Goal: Just be happy. And leave the world with no regrets other than that I won't be around to tell everybody "told you so."
Plan: Check off as many of the following as possible. (List has been abridged to reflect time constraints and would otherwise contain items requiring great travel and time such as walking across the Golden Gate Bridge, visiting Juliet's house in Verona, writing something brilliant, and learning to fly an aircraft of some sort. If I'm wrong - I'll add these on and start a new list!)

1. Find a boy named Tommy. Karaoke Livin' on a Prayer.
2. Shoot a gun. (A real one)
3. Get shot at. (Just paintball will suffice here.)
4. Get hair dyed at a salon.
5. Get a tattoo.
6. Go horseback riding.
7. Go camping.
8. Run a 5k.
9. Drink around the world at Epcot.
10. See the manatees at Blue Springs.
11. Swim in a lake by moonlight one more time.

This list may be added to at any time but nothing will come off it. Any suggestions and/or help and/or accompaniment is very welcome. (#3 is already paid for and I just need a buddy.) #5 is planned for October. #4 is done!

Before:


After:


Let the games begin.